Now those of us who’ve read this column know that we love scotch. We love scotch so much we’d actually marry it – despite thinking marrying anything not human is beyond weird. So while Justice was journeying through many places one of his highlights was Glenmorangie. A solid scotch that we all enjoy from time to time. So when we saw that there was a tasting pack of Glenmorangie’s starters (aka nothing over the age of 12) we gladly picked it up.
Do you lot remember a few years back when that volcano erupted in Iceland? The name of that volcano was Eyjafjallajökull and it disrupted air travel all over Europe and Asia the likes of which had not been seen for such a small volcanic eruption.
When most of us heard that we thought: Woah, volcano! And what a hell of a name that is! Amazing!
The people at Reyka Vodka said: Who wants to go collect rocks from the volcano to distill our vodka with?
Where that is not 100% accurate as I cannot prove that they used those rocks BUT it would not surprise me if that exact sentiment went into crafting this vodka.
I spent most of my time writing this intro trying to think of a clever way to compare Jura and the show ’16 and Pregnant’ with the word ‘disappointment’ as the punchline. As you can see I didn’t quite make it, though as my first statement might imply, Jura really wasn’t worth me wasting anymore of my time trying to be clever on its behalf. So here’s Jura: A half decent Single Malt Scotch that things its the shit.
Well back to what we always do review vodkas – Funny I wrote that as booze but then I realized how many vodka’s we’ve actually reviewed in our near 2 years here. This one though you may have not heard of as its micro-distilled. Which means that – oh yes – it’s time for some vodka hipster reviews.
Most recently we celebrated in the combined birthday of both a Buffalo, and a Bear. To mark the festivities we decided to enjoy the wonders of a British style pub known as the British Beer Company (BBC) – which first off is a chain bar in American meaning the purpose of being a true British Pub is essentially out the window. BUT bring on the goofy racism.
Finally we come to the last spirit reviewed from Nauticon and while my comrades rated this overall I personally will be going over the finer details of this bourbon. Why? Because the Buffalo and Bourbon go together like – well fuck – buffalos and bourbon I guess.
A more noble beverage I have not yet tasted.
Too formal? I personally don’t think so. If nothing else when I first tried this scotch while dressed in a suit vest I was probably a bit under-dressed. Today on Booze Reviews ladies and gentlemen, I, Justice, will show you the end of a legacy. That’s right, we’ve finally finished the full spectrum of Johnnie Walker scotches with this very appropriate choice: Johnnie Walker Gold Label.
Eagle-eyed readers will have noted I mentioned this being the ‘scotch’ of Cuervo’s a few weeks back. I would like to now publicly apologize for that statement as I now realize it was said during St Patrick’s day, and told to me secondhand. Now while we commonly here mix Mexican and Irish themes it would appear mixing whisky with tequila isn’t the best of ideas.
So we’ll be going over the reviews from the Live @ Nauticon event in the following month, but to give us some time to heal and sit down to actually write everything up we’ve decided to include a review into our repertoire that honestly we should have already done a year and a half ago.
Hello and once again. So for those who know Booze Reviews you may know that we don’t give a fuck about other reviewers with their A-B-C grading and any time a “reviewing company” leaves a little note in your liquor store saying something is a 90 and it’s not locked away in a cabinet guarded by hellbeasts we weep. Though not in an unmanly way, because we weep scotch, and then we drink that scotch. Which is why next week we’ll be doing Booze Reviews Live at Nauticon. And you want to know the funny thing – we don’t even know what were doing. Which can only mean one thing – that awesome is gonna happen. So if you’re in the New England Area head over and do that – because it’s a con that has spirits tastings – and anime. Which coincidentally is what I do with my life.
