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Navy Bay Dark Jamaican Rum 750mL

Because this is 2021 we’ve had to order spirits and beers and such online or via delivery apps. This was not our first choice of rum, but was selected as an alternate. We approved it because – well we hadn’t reviewed it anyway, and that’s really the only modus operandi we have. This would later be known as the ‘turning point’ the decision that we truly, and honestly wish we could go back and reverse. Because FUCK this rum.

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Definitive Portals Strawberry & Vanilla Sour Ale

Portals Strawberry & Vanilla: 3.0 – If you have been lamenting the loss of the strawberry cremesaver you are in luck. This is like that in the oddest beer format you could imagine. However it is also just awful and wrong. Even if you did like the candy it’s unlikely you could drink more than a half pour of this. While there are some companies who can take strawberry & vanilla and knock it out of the park, this is not one of the,

Price Average: $5

Website: https://www.definitivebrewing.com/

Bourge Noble Vodka 750mL

We now come to a vodka that tries so hard to seem fancy and yet is a fucken nightmare. This reeks of something made by the French, meant to seem like it’s location and pedigree make it worth so much more, and yet absolutely not. Let us be the first to lay it out plain, this is a sort of shit vodka, at a not good price, that is ultimately skippable.

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3 Floyd’s Arctic Panzer Wolf Imperial IPA

Arctic Panzer Wolf: 2.5 – This site is still new to IPAs (because they by and large suck), but we’d found enough that were okay to warrant it. This is not one of those – it’s basically what you would expect from an imperial IPA. A 9% stupidly hopped beer that’s shouting it’s hopness at you like – well like some sort of dangerous wolf beast

Price Average: $16 for 4-pack tall cans

Website: https://www.3floyds.com/

Raffles Gin 750mL

It wasn’t initially clear that this gin had relation to Sipsmith, but it seems much like that gin – this is really a Gin & Tonic gin that is mildly okay elsewhere. In reality while it’s really nice to have unique and diverse gins – sometimes you just want something to throw into tonic and be done with it. The benefit is that while Sipsmith is harder and much more expensive to get stateside, this does not have the issue (fully).

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Cincoro Blanco Tequila 750mL

There are many things that are considered ‘top-shelf’ and are placed there accordingly. This given it’s height (just under 18 inches) sort of demands to be top-shelf, like a “just try to figure out how I don’t go into overhead empty space”. That being said it sort of actually deserves to be there, because giant curved angle modern art bottle aside – the contents within are truly top-shelf as well.

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