We’ve never done a white rum on here, so to start let’s go with something that’s fairly new to the market as well. The stipulation being that while we may be new to reviewing white rums, unlike what this rum would want you to feel, we were not born yesterday, and we know that white rums can do much better than this.
The Captain seems to be whoring himself out much like the wenches in his stories – and while things like Captain Morgan black are a fun thing to think about getting (before you just grab Kraken) this blatant coup at Bacardi is rather hilarious in execution of which dear Morgan handles it rather poorly.
Captain Morgan is very lucky it makes Private Stock, because I would otherwise ignore the company entirely – the rums is makes can be easily circumvented depending on what you want from the rum; however very few match what Private Stock can do, and for that I’ll allow Capt. to continue to experiment – but white rum?
What they Say: “Captain Henry Morgan, the legendary buccaneer, was appointed Governor of Jamaica in 1680. He and his crew sailed the waters of the Caribbean in search of conquest and treasure. These pristine waters inspired the creation of Captain Morgan Caribbean White Rum – a smooth and refined rum perfect for the ultimate celebratory drink.”
What a load of horseshit, they did this for the money and the hope that it would take off.
Taste: 6.0 – There’s a brief moment of sweetness here as far as the initial taste goes, it then devolves into the aftertaste.
Aftertaste: 1.0 – Which is really not a pleasant thing at all. I rarely have had a white rum straight, but I can assure you that it shouldn’t taste like that.
Burn/Smooth: 4.0 – This does burn going down. It’s not much and it’s not killing you, but couple it with the tastes above and it becomes disgusting.
Aroma: 5.5 – The smell is certainly prominent here, but it’s not hitting you in the face too much. It lacks a certain ‘drink me’ characteristic though.
Honesty: 3.0 – What a crock, I’m sorry they tried to make Captain Morgan Black once Kraken started making money, and this is just another offshoot like Oakheart to grab money – inspired by the pristine waters of a pirates pissbucket sea? Bullshit. The Captain may be iconic, but a white rum by them – fat chance.
Mixability: 4.5
With Coke: 5.0 – Ehh, it’s a rum and coke – it makes it a bit sweeter, but that taste sadly still shows up (although not nearly as much.)
Faux Mojito: 4.0 – That awful aftertaste is sadly too much here that I need to really starting messing with the proportions to atdd
Value: 2.0 – Simply just way too much for the shitty shitty drink it is. Honestly Bacardi is much better at this, and DonQ is even better.
Google Shop Average: $18
Website: http://www.captainmorgan.com/
Reviewer Scores:
BuffaloJern: 3.0
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Metric Score: 26.0/70 |+| Metric Average: 3.71 |+| Reviewer Average: 3.0
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Final Thoughts:
This was meant to be an experiment, and a way for the Captain to nip at Bacardi’s territory, but serious Captain you have spiced rum already – work on improving that, and by that I mean continue to make Private Stock.
