We’ve often maligned Macallan in-person as the ‘what those who know nothing of scotch buy and say is the pinnacle.’ which is likely why this is our first review of them. No need for a spoiler alert though – because it’s been maligned for a damn good reason – it’s awful.
Normally we write a bit here, but look below and you’ll see why we’ll just say – fuck you Macallan.
What they Say: “Bottle: Exclusively matured in selected sherry oak casks from Jerez, Spain
Our unflattering obsession with selecting exceptional oak casks and distilling sublime spirit brings an unsurpassed, timeless quality to The Macallan. Distilled at The Macallan distillery in Speyside, Scotland, this legendary Single malt is exclusively matured in selected sherry oak casks from Jerez, Spain for a minimum of Twelve years. This results in a satisfyingly rich and complex Single Malt.
Colour: Rich Gold
Age: 12 Years Old
Nose: Vanilla, with a hint of ginger, dried fruit, sherry sweetness and wood smoke.
Palate: Deliciously smooth, rich dried fruit and sherry, balanced with wood smoke and spice.
Finish: Sweet toffee and dried fruit, with wood smoke and spice.
Respected and admired by the world’s most sophisticated and discerning whisky drinkers, The Macallan remains the Single Malt against which all others must be judged. This peerless reputation has been built by The Masters of Spirit and Wood, those craftsmen at the heart of The Macallan since it was legally licensed in 1824.
Underpinning this mastery are The Macallan’s six pillars: the unique elements that combine to make The Macallan so special.
Easter Elchies House proudly watches over The Macallan distillery in Speyside, Scotland. Built in 1700, this Jacobean manor house is The Macallan’s spiritual home.
The Macallan’s curiously small and uniquely shaped copper stills help to concentrate the flavour of the ‘new make’ spirit.
The ‘cut’ is the amount of distilled spirit collected from the stills. The Macallan takes one of the finest ‘cuts’ of any distillery in Scotland; only the best of the best, typically just 16% is selected to fill our casks. This distinctly robust and characterful ‘new make’ spirit is the starting point for all Macallan.
This Macallan is exclusively matured in selected sherry oak casks from Jerez, Spain. These casks are filled with ages sherries and left to season and mature for two years. Only then are they deemed ready to begin the 2,000 mile journey to The Macallan distillery. Here they will receive The Macallan distillery. Here they will receive The Macallan ‘new make’ spirit that will slowly mature into this make’ spirit that will slowly mature into this satisfyingly rich and complex Single Malt.
At The Macallan, natural colour is something we insist on. It is the interaction of spirit and wood alone which deliver the rich diversity of colour evident throughout The Macallan range.
Our Whisky Maker keeps a watchful eye on the slumbering casks, selecting the moment when each cask is at the peak of maturity and perfect for bottling. It is this mastery of spirit and wood that creates The Macallan…the world’s most precious whisky.”
Taste: 3.0 – It’s mildly sweet, but almost entirely sherry, which leads into the aftertaste.
Aftertaste: 1.5 – New policy, if you like the aftertaste of Macallan 12 yr, you are banned from ever reviewing on our site. God that’s awful, even for a sherry cask.
Burn/Smooth: 2.5 – This can basically be summed up as ‘can you drink this without winge-ing?’ the answer being – no.
Aroma: 3.0 – There’s sherry and that’s it. None of the other nonsense they say.
Honesty: 1.0 – Whatever points this had, whatever good will it had, is so fucken far past long gone. They jizzed into a word dump and made us write it. Fuck you.
W/ Rocks: 4.0 -It certainly makes it drinkable I’ll give them that. Overall though it’s not enough for how just awful this single malt really is.
Value: 3.0 – We got this for a whole 11 dollars cheaper for a party, and it’s a regret we’ll long have. You shouldn’t pay 30 dollars for this shite.
Google Shop Average: $61
Metric Score: 18/70 |+| Metric Average: 2.57 |+| Reviewer Average: 2.0
Final Thoughts: I’ve been staring at this paragraph wondering what to write having already skipped on the above paragraph. Fuck it. This is bad scotch, and along with Jura one of the least favourable reviews this site has seen regarding scotch.