AHA! This review comes to in you in Buffalo Time? Why? Because I’m the gorram buffalo you snot nosed brat. Now sit down it’s story
The American buffalo is a majestic and beautiful creature, much like the Kodiak bear. Now I have existed as the buffalo since the beginning of the suns and stars, and there have been many spirits that carry my name. Why whiskies love to claim their buffalo heritage as the men who made them surely have been buffalos from past times.
But this clamor did not start in the America’s oh no, like most things it originated across the seas and tides in a place called Europe. Now Poland has done really well for itself being a chip off the old block that is its Russian daddy. They can make a fine vodka, and they’ve created a new type of vodka. This doesn’t involve gundam at all, but a variety of flavorings in the vodka notably the grass from fields the buffalo roam.
Now since it is known that you can lead a buffalo to vodka and he will always drink I decided to do this review myself. Why? Because you’re adopted that’s why. Now unfortunately I live in a hellhole called Connecticut, and while I know the bottle has text, sadly only the nips are available in my area.
As such I’ve taken the liberties of looking through the about page on their site. (Excerpt from Link)
What they say: “For centuries in eastern Poland, massive buffalo have roamed the lush and fertile fields that are full of rich flowers and “Zubrowka” or “Bison Grass,” an herb steeped in intrigue, mystique and romanticism. High Society would celebrate hunting successes with a special vodka flavored with “Bison Grass,” in belief this would yield grand power, increase stature and youthfulness which centuries later had been banned from American shores. Distillers and chemists have been able to extract the essence from the “Bison Grass,” allowing vodka enthusiasts and cocktail aficionados to be captivated with this new aromatic vodka with a burst of freshness, bouquet of flavor on the pallet and silky smooth finish. Bak’s Bison Grass Vodka is the perfect celebratory spirit for the young stylish professional as well as the vodka connoisseur who’s looking to be enticed by authentic vodka. This revolutionary product is not your typical flavored vodka, rather a vodka rich in flavor.”
Well their story isn’t even remotely as good as mine, and while the wank is heavy it’s from a site where they can write pages of how great they thin their product is. So moving on you redheaded step child let’s see how this scores so I can put it in that damn excel list.
Taste: 7 – I want this on the record, this is not vodka, it is a flavored vodka and I am judging it as such. Because oddly enough this vodka has some layers, there’s the first hit of cream, then vodka, than a burn and finally cream again. Not bad though.
Aftertaste: 7.5 – Little bit of nice aftertaste, but then there’s just that warmness that goes on and stays with you. Like whisky warmness, but with vanilla.
Burn/Smooth: 6.5 – There is a little burn, but it’s not horrendous.
Aroma: 7.5 – There’s a hint of vanilla. Just kidding, it’s chock full of vanilla. I was expecting a grassy earth kind of smell, not the cake and nut mix that’s going on here. It’s not a clean odorless smell like most vodkas here, and it smells so creamy you can barely detect the ethanol.
Manliness: 6.5 – Now I will admit the blade of grass in the bottle is a bit gimmicky, but it works, and most likely give the vodka it’s slightly green tint. Now I’d like to give it points for having a buffalo on it, but so do all Zubrowka type vodka’s. Bottle is also meh just having a flat face.
Vodka Tonic: 7.5 – Well if you’re looking for a regular vodka tonic that just tastes like tonic water, leave now. This however tastes just like the vodka with some tonic thrown in giving you that lingering aftertaste.
Vodka Martini: 7.5 – I like this because it brings something to the table in a vodka martini which is usually lackluster to a regular gin martini. Again though the vanilla is strong here.
White Russian: 7.5 – Now by rights I should judge this as a vanilla white Russian, because typically those are really nice, and that’s exactly what you get here. Even as Russians go though it’s just deliciousness followed again by that lingering vanilla taste.
Value: 4.5 – Well the vodka has to do bad somewhere, but 24 dollars is not what I would pay for this. Sure it’s creamy, and does well in drinks (though they are non-standard), but it’s more a novelty price. If this was 4 dollars less I’d rate it a solid 6, but you’re buying this because you’re curious not that you particularly need it.
Google Shop Average: $24
Metric Score: 47/70 |+| Metric Average: 6.71 |+|
Now even I’m unsure how this fares against the other varieties of Bison Grass vodka, but as far as flavored vodkas go it’s good stuff. My main issue with it is that it’s not something you’d regularly buy. It’s like Bakon, yes you will buy it once, drink and enjoy it. But it will linger, or be used as a stand in when you run out of vodka. It’s not desirable though as something you’d “keep on” and use for drinks though. Then again this is true for most flavored vodka’s their one trick ponies, and nobody loves ponies. Except for little girls and idiots.
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