Hola! Happy Cinco de Mayo everyone! I bet you’re wondering why we’re not using this golden opportunity to review a tequila – to which I can only say an old Spanish proverb. “It is not one to review that one cannot remember.” Now I’m not sure what that means but it sounded profound enough to excuse away why we started this morning with some scotch. Justice had actually considered mixability with cereal, but then we couldn’t decide which cereal. (Hint: should have been CTC)
So we’re getting much closer to fully collecting the entire Johnnie Walker Line, but we neglected to review the lowest rung, the entry level, the too fucken bad I wanted Blue Label. Now I’m not sure if the metaphor I want to use here is the Captain Planet one, or if I should stick to straight Pokemon. Oh wait I know Power Rangers, because then the Black Ranger is actually Double Black – because you know Black Guy in a Black Suit. Shutup it works.
So then what would the Red Ranger be – well I can tell you this much it sure as hell ain’t heart. Balls already mixed them up. Either way this surely is a solid blended scotch but it’s average. Which is fine – I mean at $24 I’m glad Blue Label actually almost comes off as 10 times the price, and for an entry level scotch it’s nothing to be ashamed of.
Note: The bottle has no text, I’ve been told the box does and it goes like this. “The Walker family used their encyclopedic knowledge of Scotland’s malts to create a blend with universal appeal. The result? Red Label became the world’s favorite whisky, a position it still holds today. Developed for an export market with a taste for long, refreshing drinks, it’s the label that built the Walker empire, and the brand that defined the whisky business.”
Taste: 5.67 – It’s average in terms of a scotch, but really has this feeling of sweetness to it, like they added sugars to heal the taste.
Aftertaste: 4.67 – This is less pleasant, and it continues to have the sweet taste to it.
Burn/Smooth: 4 – For a whisky the burn is tolerable – for a blended scotch though it’s certainly below average. As Justice stated “warms my chest…then lights it on fire, then rubs the scars to try and make it feel better, but its too late; the damage is done.”
Aroma: 5.5 – We got some varied smell here, William found it to be classic JW, The Buffalo thought it smelled sweet and like cognac, and Justice found it to be merely average.
Manliness: 7.17 – Aside from the fact that its red and that’s an auto + for us, its also Johnnie Walker Red and so quite manly. The whiskey itself doesn’t hurt its reputation too much, but it doesn’t help it all that much
w/ Rocks: 6.33 – We really like what this does to it. It brings out the flavor, and also takes away almost all of the burn. Buffalo was hoping though that it would get nice and smoky like Black Label does, and was sorely disappointed.
Rusty Nail: 8 – Going by the sweetness of the scotch I made sure to adjust and add less Drambuie – and I got just the right amount – not the best rusty nail I’ve had, but damn close.
Value: 5.67 – Not bad for a scotch but is about the quality you expect, but I’d always go the 10 bucks more for one of it’s older brothers
Google Shop Average: $24
William Henri Neve the IV: 6
Metric Score: 39.83/70 |+| Metric Average: 5.69 |+| Reviewer Average: 5.33
A solid blended whisky with a Johnnie Walker twist. It may be manly and a damn fine rusty nail but as a scotch it’s really just average – which is fine it is the entry level Walker for a reason.